There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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