they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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