Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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