O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
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