Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
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It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
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I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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