I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I enjoy the company of your penis
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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