He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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