i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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