Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
