If i come over, it means nothing
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
No stitches, just platelets and will power
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Randomize
