dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
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I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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