Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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