So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
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Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
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I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more