The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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