I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
