our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
