apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
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Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
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i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize