Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
