i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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