singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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