I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
