this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
