I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
