so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize