I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
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this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
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The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.