We need to rekindle our bromance
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
