you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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