Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
