so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
