I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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