we're blogging at a bar
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
