Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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