Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
she pinky promised me she was 18
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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