i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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