I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
