you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Less talking, more tequila
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
