Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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