I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
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