Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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