Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
