Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
