bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
