I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
