ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
