she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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