I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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