Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
