I wanna bring you to show and tell
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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