She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
