you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
